questions about young males

Caro · Post by **Caro** » Wed Aug 11, 2004 5:24 am

So my older brother left his 4 year old son when he died, and the child has had sort of a rough life since then. I haven't been able to spend much time with him until now, he's come to visit us. Of course he looks just like his father, he turned 12 today, but he has some behavioral issues. At first he would turn major anger on me, whenever he didn't like something. But we worked through that and he realized he couldn't treat me that way, because he thought my enormous default love for him would make me cow and let him intimidate me. He very physically in shape and almost as tall as I am. He's still only 12 and I managed to retain my authority.

Ok so here's the main problem and question. He's living with us, and my little sister who is 11. She is a precious child, very innocent but unfortunately very prematurely developed. I walked into the living room today, and my nephew was jutting around the living room... uh, displaying his boyhood. What I mean is to say he popped a boner and proceded to pull his shorts down tight, and generally play with himself in front of my sister and I. I told Hanna to go in the other room and explained to him that his behavior was obscene, that we are girls in his family and that I would not allow him to corrupt my little sister. He got very angry and later thought it was funny that we became upset.

So, seeing as how there are many patrons who were recently 12 year old boys, could you please give me some advice on how to handle this. The kid's obsessed with his genitals. The only thing I could think of was to take him swimming, get him in cool water. Should I encourage him to have "private time" or what? I'm worried that he may talk my sister into doing something they'd both regret. I watch the kids 3 days a week but they are unsupervised for 2.

TIA,
Caro

limit · Post by **limit** » Wed Aug 11, 2004 7:51 am

So, you're thinking they might try to have sex...

Well, firstly seeing as though you're sister is his auntie (...right?), I think you should explain to him firstly (depending on how mature his mind is) about incest, inbreds that sort of thing. Then, my suggestion is to tell him that all the kids at school will make fun of him....can be a biig deterrent.

As for letting him have "private time"...not sure, because on one hand he would be releasing all the energy he's building up. But on the other, it may just make him more aroused if you know what i mean...yeesh this is a weird thread!!

Sovetskeey · Post by **Sovetskeey** » Wed Aug 11, 2004 8:56 am

Smack the little cocksucker upside the head and tell him he's a sick fuck.
Just my radical ideas on parenting

.

weedguru tom · Post by **weedguru tom** » Wed Aug 11, 2004 9:14 am

sounds liek an attentien thing, he obviously wants to 'sho-off' what heas got to this new girl , the aunti thing is a good idea, if all that fails just smack him.

Wed Aug 11, 2004 9:30 am

I'd love to agree with the smacking him upside the head bit, but I'd like to maybe suggest the "private time" idea.

I think that being a 12 year old boy was a bit confusing at the time, but still, no need for the free show. I'd consider telling him that if he ever feels the urge to do it again, maybe at least go to his bedroom or something.

It needs to be explained to him that this behaviour is neither appreciated, nor encouraged by anyone in the household.

Also, if there's a male adult in the house, i'd tell them that maybe you noticed a few things about the kid and the adult may want to talk to him about it, being male and all. But still I wouldn't tell the adult about the 'incident', surely that wouldn't go down too well.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Wed Aug 11, 2004 9:37 am

I've read that if you scare him, by telling him whut he is doing is this evil thing and that it's so wrong will only make him grow up to be someone with a fetish for what you condemned.
Ya know? like... tell him its wrong cus he's young and he will be a pedofile or arroused by that typa shit in his mind.

Or tell him its cus they're brother n sister and he'll fantasize about sleepin with his relatives.

I'm really serious... that's how these things develope. I'm not saying it WILL happen, but it might. I'd say, check out some credible sources online. Don't ask around here (no offense) cus it's not credible.
Regardless....
In my opinion... I'd say, tell him it's natural to be having the thoughts and shit and the need to explore is really natural and normal.. but that our society (or jus say ppl today) have morals, and then go into detail as to why what he's doing goes against society's morals (ask rules, nay, things to live by)

I dunno. Tuff shit. crazy situation... i would have no clue about my brother doing that typa shit, he's 14. Never exposed himself thank god.

Funk Doctor · Post by **Funk Doctor** » Wed Aug 11, 2004 2:01 pm

Tell him Santa won't come to him if he does things like that in front of people. Worked when my 10 year old nephew started 'discovering' himself.

4*20 · Post by **4*20** » Wed Aug 11, 2004 2:37 pm

A_Fire_Inside wrote: I'd love to agree with the smacking him upside the head bit, but I'd like to maybe suggest the "private time" idea.
I think that being a 12 year old boy was a bit confusing at the time, but still, no need for the free show. I'd consider telling him that if he ever feels the urge to do it again, maybe at least go to his bedroom or something.
It needs to be explained to him that this behaviour is neither appreciated, nor encouraged by anyone in the household.
Also, if there's a male adult in the house, i'd tell them that maybe you noticed a few things about the kid and the adult may want to talk to him about it, being male and all. But still I wouldn't tell the adult about the 'incident', surely that wouldn't go down too well.

Not only that, but also I'd suggest you take your little sister aside, and explain her that the boy is going through a sexual crisis and that if he tries to approach her in any kind, that she can tell him to go fuck himself and give her tips on how to deal with him. (lock yourself in your room, call me, run to the closest adult person around)
Make sure that if she is confronted to that situation, she is going to have ways to get out of it. Maybe even teach her how to kick in the nuts, that might be useful.

Caro · Post by **Caro** » Wed Aug 11, 2004 5:28 pm

Yeah too bad there are no adult males around here. My mom is letting me practice my parenting on my sis and now my nephew. Thanks for all the advice!

tweedle · Post by **tweedle** » Wed Aug 11, 2004 6:20 pm

buy him a porn mag and just leave it in his room and he'll deal with it there

Arik ^ · Post by **Arik ^** » Wed Aug 11, 2004 9:56 pm

Just strait up tell him that shit is wrong and later he will regret all of it. maybe not like that but get him thinking, I think if parents gave their kids more to think about that makes them a stronger person instead of just play. Allthough play is very important too and does help with problem solving not everything is about play. If kids have these strange brain twisters to think about dealing with life and other stuff, They will take it in their own direction. Get what I mean? As in let him think about his own morals but guide him. Every one is not perfect but when someone can learn to live by good morals thats a huge plus for not only his life but people around him.

you should for sure think of a way to Dicipline him and a little something I learned from my child development class. Punish kids acording to the problem which leaves me clueless as in what to do. But you know the kid and the problem more then I do.

To be honest this is could be pretty serious or it could just be him being a little kid. This is something you may want to get more advice on.

Shredd · Post by **Shredd** » Thu Aug 12, 2004 2:19 am

you should make up something like 'everytime you masturbate your willy shrinks a little, and if you keep doing it, it will shrink into a little jelly bean" or maybe something like "...you will start going bald" kids that young believe that stuff and get scared

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Thu Aug 12, 2004 5:57 am

argh....caro, don't use scare tactics.
They backfire, big time. Read a book on this shit.... don't hit him or scare him that's not advice you should listen to...frik......
this agrivates me.

weedguru tom · Post by **weedguru tom** » Thu Aug 12, 2004 8:24 am

Weedguru Caro wrote:Yeah too bad there are no adult males around here. My mom is letting me practice my parenting on my sis and now my nephew. Thanks for all the advice!

thank-you caro.thankyou

Caro · Post by **Caro** » Fri Aug 13, 2004 3:39 am

Tom? pleasy clarify.

Anyway, i would never tell him masturbation is bad, because it isn't. When my sister develops a sex drive (she still likes pokemon and thinks boys are gross) I will suggest that she purchase a lil' sumpin and maintain her virginity into adulthood. I would much rather have my nephew masturbate than to try and get some, possibly from one of his own tempting family members he doesn't know that well. The thing is he just needs to know that's something you do in private. Hell I had done it in private 1/2 hour before I walked in on him, so it made me feel sort of bad.

If it happens again I will just explain to him that sex, even with oneself, is a private affair.

PS some of the advice here is pretty whack. Giving porn to a kid is sexual abuse.

There was a reason I deleted your first post, Tweedle. May you never have children, or supervise them.

www.weedguru.com

questions about young males

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