Daddy, please tell me (US politics)

[4*20]

>Q: Daddy, why did we have to attack Iraq?
>A: Because they had weapons of mass destruction,
>honey.
>Q: But the inspectors didn't find any weapons of mass
>destruction.
>A: That's because the Iraqis were hiding them.
>Q: And that's why we invaded Iraq?
>A: Yep. Invasions always work better than inspections.
>Q: But after we invaded them, we STILL didn't find any
>weapons of mass destruction, did we?
>A: That's because the weapons are so well hidden.
>Don't worry, we'll find something, probably right
>before the 2004 election.
>Q: Why did Iraq want all those weapons of mass
>destruction?
>A: To use them in a war, silly.
>Q: I'm confused. If they had all those weapons that
>they planned to use in a war, then why didn't they use
>any of those weapons when we went to war with them?
>A: Well, obviously they didn't want anyone to know
>they had those weapons, so they chose to die by the
>thousands rather than defend themselves.
>Q: That doesn't make sense Daddy. Why would they
>choose to die if they had all those big weapons to
>fight us back with?
>A: It's a different culture. It's not supposed to make
>sense.
>Q: I don't know about you, but I don't think they had
>any of those weapons our government said they did.
>A: Well, you know, it doesn't matter whether or not
>they had those weapons. We had another good reason to
>invade them anyway.
>Q: And what was that?
>A: Even if Iraq didn't have weapons of mass
>destruction, Saddam Hussein was a cruel dictator,
>which is another good reason to invade another
>country.
>Q: Why? What does a cruel dictator do that makes it OK
>to invade his country?
>A: Well, for one thing, he tortured his own people.
>Q: Kind of like what they do in China?
>A: Don't go comparing China to Iraq. China is a good
>economic competitor, where millions of people work for
>slave wages in sweatshops to make U.S. corporations
>richer.
>Q: So if a country lets its people be exploited for
>American corporate gain, it's a good country, even if
>that country tortures people?
>A: Right.
>Q: Why were people in Iraq being tortured?
>A: For political crimes, mostly, like criticizing the
>government. People who criticized the government in
>Iraq were sent to prison and tortured.
>Q: Isn't that exactly what happens in China?
>A: I told you, China is different.
>Q: What's the difference between China and Iraq?
>A: Well, for one thing, Iraq was ruled by the Ba'ath
>party, while China is Communist.
>Q: Didn't you once tell me Communists were bad?
>A: No, just Cuban Communists are bad.
>Q: How are the Cuban Communists bad?
>A: Well, for one thing, people who criticize the
>government in Cuba are sent to prison and tortured.
>Q: Like in Iraq?
>A: Exactly.
>Q: And like in China, too?
>A: I told you, China's a good economic competitor.
>Cuba, on the other hand, is not.
>Q: How come Cuba isn't a good economic competitor?
>A: Well, you see, back in the early 1960s, our
>government passed some laws that made it illegal for
>Americans to trade or do any business with Cuba until
>they stopped being Communists and started being
>capitalists like us.
>Q: But if we got rid of those laws, opened up trade
>with Cuba, and started doing business with them,
>wouldn't that help the Cubans become capitalists?
>A: Don't be a smart-ass.
>Q: I didn't think I was being one.
>A: Well, anyway, they also don't have freedom of
>religion in Cuba.
>Q: Kind of like China and the @!#$ movement?
>A: I told you, stop saying bad things about China.
>Anyway, Saddam Hussein came to power through a
>military coup, so he's not really a legitimate leader
>anyway.
>Q: What's a military coup?
>A: That's when a military general takes over the
>government of a country by force, instead of holding
>free elections like we do in the United States.
>Q: Didn't the ruler of Pakistan come to power by a
>military coup?
>A: You mean General Pervez Musharraf? Uh, yeah, he
>did, but Pakistan is our friend.
>Q: Why is Pakistan our friend if their leader is
>illegitimate?
>A: I never said Pervez Musharraf was illegitimate.
>Q: Didn't you just say a military general who comes to
>power by forcibly overthrowing the legitimate
>government of a nation is an illegitimate leader?
>A: Only Saddam Hussein. Pervez Musharraf is our
>friend, because he helped us invade Afghanistan.
>Q: Why did we invade Afghanistan?
>A: Because of what they did to us on September 11th.
>Q: What did Afghanistan do to us on September 11th?
>A: Well, on September 11th, nineteen men, fifteen of
>them Saudi Arabians, hijacked four airplanes and flew
>three of them into buildings,killing over 3,000
>Americans.
>Q: So how did Afghanistan figure into all that?
>A: Afghanistan was where those bad men trained, under
>the oppressive rule of the Taliban.
>Q: Aren't the Taliban those bad radical Islamics who
>chopped off people's heads and hands?
>A: Yes, that's exactly who they were. Not only did
>they chop off people's heads and hands, but they
>oppressed women, too.
>Q: Didn't the Bush administration give the Taliban 43
>million dollars back in May of 2001?
>A: Yes, but that money was a reward because they did
>such a good job fighting drugs.
>Q: Fighting drugs?
>A: Yes, the Taliban were very helpful in stopping
>people from growing opium poppies.
>Q: How did they do such a good job?
>A: Simple. If people were caught growing opium
>poppies, the Taliban would have their hands and heads
>cut off.
>Q: So, when the Taliban cut off people's heads and
>hands for growing flowers, that was OK, but not if
>they cut people's heads and hands off for other
>reasons?
>A: Yes. It's OK with us if radical Islamic
>fundamentalists cut off people's hands for growing
>flowers, but it's cruel if they cut off people's hands
>for stealing bread.
>Q: Don't they also cut off people's hands and heads in
>Saudi Arabia?
>A: That's different. Afghanistan was ruled by a
>tyrannical patriarchy that oppressed women and forced
>them to wear burqas whenever they were in public, with
>death by stoning as the penalty for women who did not
>comply.
>Q: Don't Saudi women have to wear burqas in public,
>too?
>A: No, Saudi women merely wear a traditional Islamic
>body covering.
>Q: What's the difference?
>A: The traditional Islamic covering worn by Saudi
>women is a modest yet fashionable garment that covers
>all of a woman's body except for her eyes and fingers.
>The burqa, on the other hand, is an evil tool of
>patriarchal oppression that covers all of a woman's
>body except for her eyes and fingers.
>Q: It sounds like the same thing with a different
>name.
>A: Now, don't go comparing Afghanistan and Saudi
>Arabia. The Saudis are our friends.
>Q: But I thought you said 15 of the 19 hijackers on
>September 11th were from Saudi Arabia.
>A: Yes, but they trained in Afghanistan.
>Q: Who trained them?
>A: A very bad man named Osama bin Laden.
>Q: Was he from Afghanistan?
>A: Uh, no, he was from Saudi Arabia too. But he was a
>bad man, a very bad man.
>Q: I seem to recall he was our friend once.
>A: Only when we helped him and the mujahadeen repel
>the Soviet invasion of Afghanistan back in the 1980s.
>Q: Who are the Soviets? Was that the Evil Communist
>Empire Ronald Reagan talked about?
>A: There are no more Soviets. The Soviet Union broke
>up in 1990 or thereabouts, and now they have elections
>and capitalism like us. We call them Russians now.
>Q: So the Soviets, I mean, the Russians, are now our
>friends?
>A: Well, not really. You see, they were our friends
>for many years after they stopped being Soviets, but
>then they decided not to support our invasion of Iraq,
>so we're mad at them now. We're also mad at the French
>and the Germans because they didn't help us invade
>Iraq either.
>Q: So the French and Germans are evil, too?
>A: Not exactly evil, but just bad enough that we had
>to rename French fries and French toast to Freedom
>Fries and Freedom Toast.
>Q: Do we always rename foods whenever another country
>doesn't do what we want them to do?
>A: No, we just do that to our friends. Our enemies, we
>invade.
>Q: But wasn't Iraq one of our friends back in the
>1980s?
>A: Well, yeah. For a while.
>Q: Was Saddam Hussein ruler of Iraq back then?
>A: Yes, but at the time he was fighting against Iran,
>which made him our friend, temporarily.
>Q: Why did that make him our friend?
>A: Because at that time, Iran was our enemy.
>Q: Isn't that when he gassed the Kurds?
>A: Yeah, but since he was fighting against Iran at the
>time, we looked the other way, to show him we were his
>friend.
>Q: So anyone who fights against one of our enemies
>automatically becomes our friend?
>A: Most of the time, yes.
>Q: And anyone who fights against one of our friends is
>automatically an enemy?
>A: Sometimes that's true, too. However, if American
>corporations can profit by selling weapons to both
>sides at the same time, all the better.
>Q: Why?
>A: Because war is good for the economy, which means
>war is good for America. Also, since God is on
>America's side, anyone who opposes war is a godless
>un-American Communist. Do you understand now why we
>attacked Iraq?
>Q: I think so. We attacked them because God wanted us
>to, right?
>A: Yes.
>Q: But how did we know God wanted us to attack Iraq?
>A: Well, you see, God personally speaks to George W.
>Bush and tells him what to do.
>Q: So basically, what you're saying is that we
>attacked Iraq because George W. Bush hears voices in
>his head?
>A. Yes! You finally understand how the world works.
>Now close your eyes, make yourself comfortable, and go
>to sleep. Good night.
>Q: Good night, Daddy.

[Caro]

Hahahah! Oh man, that was great. I'm going to send it to my religious family members who always send me pro-bush propaganda like "bush is a Christian - 'tis your Christian duty to support him. If you support Kerry, you support infanticide and you are going to Hell".

Ha ha ha. Haha. Ha! Thank you Chicka.

[Funk Doctor]

Posted on several other forums now too. Thanks Chicka

[clashcityrocker]

I didnt read all that but I read most of it.... first of all....

The reason the US thought there were WMDs in Iraq was because Saddam SAID he had them. Iraq isnt really a small place- it would be easier than you think to hide them! Im not saying they do have WMDs though. Think about it, weapons of mass destruction- SCUD missiles? who knows. They could definetly fuck up whatever they happen to land on. If a biological weapon landed nearby, you melt to death. I would rather have my country invade Iraq and make the world a little safer place for just one day, but once again Im not saying our imperialistic ways of taking over Iraq is justified.

Saddam really was a bad dictator. He was fucked up in the head!! With political power! Not a good combination. You're lying to yourself if you think that he still deserves to run that country, not only did he do a bad job of it financially but i mean come on. He killed his own civilians for his own entertainment (and wore a cowboy hat, according to 20/20 >_>)

Now theres Cuba... you see, Fidel Castro shouldn't be the real leader of Cuba. Way before you or me were even born, Castro was a Cuban rebel who had started a revolution and overthrown his government. The US thought this would end the conflict with the Soviets (Cuba was a real threat- they had "defensive" nukes, which at the wave of Kruschev's (sp?) hand, could reach the United States in about 3 minutes) But we were wrong. Castro hated the United States, and closed all ties immediately, even BANNING Americans from the country which was a really bad move (at the time- now their Socialist crap has gotten a little better. not much though)

After I read the rest I'll post something.... right now I have to go clean the kitchen

edit: oops I fucked up that paragraph about cuba. I will fix later

[4*20]

[tweedle]

quality.

[godSend]

Bush invaded iraq for its oil

[godSend]

Bush invaded iraq for its oil he just used the weapons of mass destruction and his tryant like ways as an excuse otherwise those other countries would be invaded as well as illistrated in chickas post. So whats to stop bush from invading anywhere else that has something of value? whose next, canada maybe for there fresh water or our natural resources?????

but hey dont listen to me im just a cracked out mushhead

[BGDetroit]

That was funny as hell. Is this actually a real converstaion with your dad tho...?

[godSend]

... dun think shes that dumb

[4*20]

That was funny as hell. Is this actually a real converstaion with your dad tho...?

lol, no. I didn't wrote that.

[Tokin42]

bush needs to smoke some reefer

[Weed-iculous]

Bush invaded iraq for its oil

HOLY SHIT U R ONE DUM FUCK...if we had invaded iraq for its oil y are gas prices so damn high...fucking sadam thats all i have to say...he abused the shit outta those people...9/11 osama bn laden KILL THE MOTHER FUCKER we are now rebuildingn iraq...


y r theres so many stupid liberals on this forum...im gunna stick to the rest of the forum cause i hate listening to stupid liberlas who dont have a clue wat they are talkinga bout...please if u'r gunna write something than please know wat u r talking about

[4*20]

y r theres so many stupid liberals on this forum...im gunna stick to the rest of the forum cause i hate listening to stupid liberlas who dont have a clue wat they are talkinga bout...please if u'r gunna write something than please know wat u r talking about

I suggest you go watch the movie fahrenheit 9/11 sir. Thank you.

[Funk Doctor]

Bush invaded iraq for its oil

if we had invaded iraq for its oil y are gas prices so damn high...

Because America can't export the oil as they wanted because of the resistance sabotage. Retard.

And learn how to spell, rightie.