God-sluts

[President Beavis]

Alright so I've never really believed in God or any of that BS at all, but I'm going down to KY to visit my hardcore christian relatives.

By hardcore christians, I mean they record christian CD's in their family christian rock band. They're the "leaders" of their church (A huge church that holds over 1000 people). They have a cross hung up in every room of their house and don't even have a non-christian CD in their possession so they don't expose their kids to "The devils music".

They refer to alcohol as "The Devils juice".

I told them I'm "athiest" (I don't like the term) just recently and now I'm gonna be getting shit by the shitload. Like forced attendance to church, youth group, one-on-one's with priests, family lectures etc etc.

Give me some creative ways to tell them to fuck off/suck my satanist dick/hang themselves on a cross etc etc.

[jonny cockeral]

just say i'd rather not or something

[Jay212]

Sounds like me when I visit my dads side of the family, which I don't do anymore because Im not allowed lol. Apparently my mother is a bad parent because we don't follow the path that god intends on us to lead or some shit like that, so my mom told my aunt(the "leader" aunt of my dads family) to fuckoff and the last time we saw them was at my grandpa's funeral.

One way to do it is just tell them you're gay. My sister is and that kind of pushed our family away from my dads side when they found out, which is awsome.

[Dr. Greenthumb]

Just tell them you believe. There's no way else to deal with people that ignorant.

[President Beavis]

Just tell them you believe. There's no way else to deal with people that ignorant.

And go to church with all those youth group queerbags? (I went last year), the answer's no.

P.S.- I'm not telling them I'm gay.

[Dr. Greenthumb]

P.S.- I'm not telling them I'm gay.

lol I was going to recomend that in my last post.

ps. youth group is a great place to get pussy, you'll find out that most of the other guys there are there for the same reason.

[FIRE!!!]

Give me some creative ways to tell them to fuck off/suck my satanist dick/hang themselves on a cross etc etc.

Here's a good one...

"Suck my satanist dick"

[cdc]

get your self kicked out. go to the youth group and be offensive. swear in every sentence, smoke drugs in the church get as much pussy and/or ass as you can and u will get kicked out. also talk loudly about how you have butt sex reguraly with your many girl friends while smoking drugs.

And with the family lectures if it was me i would tell them they are not my parents so they dont have a right to lecture me. also tell them you are greatfull for their trying to save you from the devil but he has completely possessed you and there is no way short of removing your own head to get rid of him.

then burp loudly

[FIRE!!!]

get your self kicked out. go to the youth group and be offenive. swear in every sentence smoke drugs in the church get as much pussy and/or ass as you can and u will get kicked out.

And with the family lectures if it was me i would tell them they are not my parents so they dont have a right to lecture me. also tell them you are greatfull for their trying to save you from the devil but he has completely possessed you and there is no way short of removing your own head to get rid of him.

then burp loudly

And after that promptly ask if anyone would like to give your dickster a little peck on the lips...have it whipped out before anyone can say no

[Weedguru_Falkon]

Wellllll you can go in with a shirt on that has a huge pentogram on it! that devils sign

even better, try to make it looks like you carved a huge one onto your chest and show it to them


Dress in all black (If you do this a lot, it gives you quite a negative reputation... i have experienced so for the last 3 years...

Blare Pantera, DevilDriver, Marilyn Manson and other anti-religious music so they can hear it.

any room you enter, find those crosses and hang them upside down

Tell then that you need to attend to the devils business, alugh, and walk straight out the front door.


hehe. you are to decide if any of this is worth doing or not. I just thought of this shit off the top of my head.

[pkkupo]

go to church, and in the middle of mass stand up and say "when i say fuck, you say jesus. FUCK"

see if anyone says jesus. then take off your pants and run.

[Weedguru_Falkon]

go to church, and in the middle of mass stand up and say "when i say fuck, you say jesus. FUCK"

see if anyone says jesus. then take off your pants and run.

makes me think of a line of a song by DevilDriver... "Join me now in saying fuck, join me now in saying you, join me now in saying fuck you, FUCK YOU!"

ahh good band. that would be pretty funny to hear someone say in church.. id take part (If ever i was caught dead in church)

Let us know how it all goes Beavis.

[President Beavis]

Wellllll you can go in with a shirt on that has a huge pentogram on it! that devils sign

Hey! I made one of those for school last year!

Front: I forgot to tell you, I worship Satan!

Back: (Huge inverted pentagram, 666, 666, 666) Religion is religion, screw off!

All I needed was a white tee and a sharpie.

[weedguru_animal]

P.S.- I'm not telling them I'm gay.

lol I was going to recomend that in my last post.

ps. youth group is a great place to get pussy, you'll find out that most of the other guys there are there for the same reason.

What the hell Please, Doc, explain how you work that one out? I used to 'hang' with a few bible bashers when i was young and none of that gang grew up to be promiscuous sluts or peep show performers.

Or were you quoting a line from Road Trip????

[death69]

go up to them and say "im not religious like you. you trying to force me is makin me is makin me uncomfortable, and i know christians are suppose to make everyone feel welcome. so welcome me, or ill cut your balls off"
make sure when you say the cut your balls off part to do a bunch of fancy moves with your switch blade